A key component of 'showing as opposed to telling' is careful word selection. You need to choose words that:

• Suit the context
• Are of a higher level ('harder words')
• Create an ambiance,

What this means is that you don't :

• Choose any word that sounds 'hard' and scatter them around your writing.
• Put a lot of long and 'difficult' words that don't make your writing better.

A few well-chosen and selective words in the right spots to enhance your writing is what we're looking for.

Let's look at 2 types of word selection that would enhance your writing:

• Connecting Words
• Adjectives

1) Connecting Words

Now that you know how a piece of creative writing is structured (Beginning – Middle – End) it is important to know how to join these sections and make them flow on from each other in a clear, polished way. The way that this is done is through effective use of connecting words such as:

then

meanwhile

at the same time next nevertheless since

after

before

Connecting words show the link between one idea and the next, and help to give your story a sense of order and of progression through time.

2) Adjectives

Here are some examples of words you can use when creating an atmosphere. Notice how word selection changes based on atmosphere. That should be your guiding principle when choosing words.

Atmosphere: Beach

He/she went (to go)	He/she saw (to see)	Words to create the atmosphere
Stumbled, Cavorted, Did cartwheels in the sand, Leisurely strolled, Struggled along the sand	Peered into the distance and across the horizon, Gazed dreamily (into the burnished sky), Sighted a (lifesaver) perched high on his lookout.	Calm,Comtemplative,Energetic,Natural,Earthly,Waves lapped the shore

Atmosphere: Busy Shopping Centre

He/she went (to go)	He/she saw (to see)	Words to create the atmosphere
Jostled, Rushed (instead of ran), Dashed towards the sales counter, Pushed ahead, Skipped through the hoards of shoppers.	Raised her eyebrows at the ridiculous price tag, Dreamily gazed at the stunning dress, Spied a sweater on sale, Secretly admired the salespersons stylish attire	Sterile, Bargain basement, Exuberant, Thrilling, Intimidating, Ominous, Crowded

Now it's time to do some examples.

Analyse this and make improvements!

Cassie was in the garden, raking up leaves. She turned on the mower which chugged to life with a grating roar.

Her sister Alex was in the house, baking scones. She heard the sound of Cassie screaming. She came running outside. Cassie was on the ground with her arm underneath the mower. Alex was sickened to the stomach; she thought Cassie was injured. Cassie lifted up her head, withdrew her arm and moaned, "My engagement ring! I dropped it on the grass and mowed over it!"

Alex went back to check on her scones. Cassie was alright, the scones were ruined!

With this:

Cassie was in the garden, raking up leaves. After some time , she turned on the mower which chugged to life with a grating roar.

Meanwhile , her sister Alex was in the house, baking scones. All of a sudden she heard the sound of Cassie screaming. Immediately she came running outside. Cassie was on the ground with her arm underneath the mower. Alex was sickened to the stomach; she thought Cassie was injured. Then Cassie lifted up her head, withdrew her arm and moaned, "My engagement ring! I dropped it on the grass and mowed over it!"

Afterwards , Alex went back to check on her scones. In the end , Cassie was alright, but the scones were ruined!

Now let's do some word selection:

Atmosphere: Hospital

He/she went (to go)	He/she saw (to see)	Words to create the atmosphere

Atmosphere: Playground

He/she went (to go)	He/she saw (to see)	Words to create the atmosphere

Key Rules to remember:

• Choose only words that ENHANCE the atmosphere that you are trying to create for your story – do not randomly choose 'hard words'.
• It is more 'intelligent' to be selective in your word choice and that will be recognised by the assessor.
• Choose a few words that enhance your writing.
• Use connecting words and adjectives.

Now it's time to do your assignment.

1. Download the assignment question here.
2. Print it out or if you want to do it electronically, save it.
3. Complete the questions to it.
4. Then check the solutions on the video below.
5. To get the worded solutions/sample essays, download them here.

---